So far today, I've experienced three internal interviews that all started with the line "well, this is a bit odd since I work with you everyday". Two of which also included the statement "I'm not really sure what to ask you since I already know you". And my personal favorite: "I didn't really you had a degree in small business!"
Apparently this isn't just a first for me.
If you ever search online for advice about internal interviews, you'll find that good information is hard to find and the information that is available is geared towards the mega corporations. I kept finding pages listing illegal interview questions and sneaky ways H.R. can get around it.
For example, they cannot ask me if I am married. Fair enough. But the interviewers are also the people who threw me a wedding shower at work.
They also cannot ask me if I have kids or if I plan to have kids. But some of the interviewers have gone out with me for drinks after work with my husband (where he told them we plan on waiting about four years).
Nothing illegal is being asked but could I still be discriminated against? These are people who already know more than they should. Like I said yesterday, maybe it isn't a win-win.
Maybe what all of this is telling me is that I need to be more guarded about my personal life at work. Which then of course leads me to the problem of how can I have a blended life if I have to unblend for eight to nine hour chunks each day.
Showing posts with label work life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work life. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Internal Interviews: Was this really a good idea?
I recently applied for an internal posting within my company and then had the chance to sit around and be paranoid for a while as they decided whether or not I was interview worthy. The whole situation is like dating gone horribly wrong – I’ve already been on this “date” for the last year and a half, I’ve asked to take the next step and the other person is standing there and thinking about it while I feel awkward.
Now that I’m trapped in the internal hiring process, it is really starting to click in my head how many problems really are in this system. I’d love to say that being promoted from within is a win-win situation for everyone but now I’m not entirely sure.
For starters, what is going to happen to your career within the company if you are not selected for the position? Will that be remembered in the future if you apply for other positions? For example, could the ABC department turn you down because if the XYZ department didn’t want you, there must be a reason? The last few days, I’ve been thinking about this like a marriage proposal – does the relationship really survive after a rejected proposal or does it just limp along until someone has the guts to call it quits?
Next problem: I would be moving out of an administrative role but it isn’t unreasonable to think that I could be perceived as the new department’s copy ‘n staple bitch. Would I forever be seen as the coffee girl or could a truly become a vital part of the new department? Would I really be able to make the impact I am capable of making?
Finally, if this new position should work out, I’d be leaving my present boss in a bit of a bind. She would have to cover the work I currently do until they find someone to replace me or I could be expected to cover both positions until someone new could be trained. I really don’t want to leave my current boss in a bad position (I have a really great working relationship with her) but at the same time, I don’t want to put myself in a bad starting position.
My big interview is scheduled for tomorrow so I’m hoping I’ll know by the end of the week how this will pan out for me. Keep your fingers crossed it works out well for me and I’ll keep you posted on the process this week.
Now that I’m trapped in the internal hiring process, it is really starting to click in my head how many problems really are in this system. I’d love to say that being promoted from within is a win-win situation for everyone but now I’m not entirely sure.
For starters, what is going to happen to your career within the company if you are not selected for the position? Will that be remembered in the future if you apply for other positions? For example, could the ABC department turn you down because if the XYZ department didn’t want you, there must be a reason? The last few days, I’ve been thinking about this like a marriage proposal – does the relationship really survive after a rejected proposal or does it just limp along until someone has the guts to call it quits?
Next problem: I would be moving out of an administrative role but it isn’t unreasonable to think that I could be perceived as the new department’s copy ‘n staple bitch. Would I forever be seen as the coffee girl or could a truly become a vital part of the new department? Would I really be able to make the impact I am capable of making?
Finally, if this new position should work out, I’d be leaving my present boss in a bit of a bind. She would have to cover the work I currently do until they find someone to replace me or I could be expected to cover both positions until someone new could be trained. I really don’t want to leave my current boss in a bad position (I have a really great working relationship with her) but at the same time, I don’t want to put myself in a bad starting position.
My big interview is scheduled for tomorrow so I’m hoping I’ll know by the end of the week how this will pan out for me. Keep your fingers crossed it works out well for me and I’ll keep you posted on the process this week.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Should we be breaking up?
There comes a time in every girl’s life where she truly has to ask herself – Am I happy with this vendor relationship? Or am I afraid that there just isn’t anything better out there? Is it time to break up?
Then she has to fire a vendor.
I spent a lot of time thinking about this for the last month or so. My favorite vendor to use sadly has my least favorite account rep. Ever. The woman is almost enough to make me drop the vendor altogether despite the fact that her organization meets my needs (and my company’s needs) best.
How do you know if it is time? Ask yourself these questions:
1. Does my account rep communicate well with me? This is usually the first sign of trouble. When your account rep stops returning your emails or phone calls, it quickly becomes obvious that the relationship isn’t working. But what about when the rep is slow to respond to questions or concerns but quick to place an order on your behalf? If your concerns are not addressed as quickly as your orders, speak up. And if you can’t reach a new agreement, request a new account rep before you become so frustrated you drop the vendor.
2. Does my account rep call me about price changes? If an item you order on a frequent basis goes up in price, your account rep should call you before the price change occurs. If this is something you discover on your own, a red flag should go up. The account rep is there to keep you, the customer, happy and informed. The time it takes to call or email you to alert you of a price change is nominal compared to the level of frustration you will experience when you discover these things on your own.
3. Does my account rep know what I look like? I have been working for my employer for a year and a half – and ordering from this vendor for just as long. I know her office is within a half hour of my office. Do I know what she looks like? No. Does she have a firm understanding of who my company is? Definitely not. Your account rep needs to know who you are in order to help your company best. A ten minute stop in to your office goes a long way. The rep doesn’t need to be my best friend but she should be comfortable leaving her office and stopping by mine with new catalogs and services at least once a year.
I didn’t spend too much time thinking about these questions until the situation had gotten out of hand. Asking for a new account rep is easier than switching vendors and most companies live by the rule that it is easier to keep a customer than find a new one. Sure, the conversation is a little awkward at best but at least you don’t have return each others stuff at the end of it.
Then she has to fire a vendor.
I spent a lot of time thinking about this for the last month or so. My favorite vendor to use sadly has my least favorite account rep. Ever. The woman is almost enough to make me drop the vendor altogether despite the fact that her organization meets my needs (and my company’s needs) best.
How do you know if it is time? Ask yourself these questions:
1. Does my account rep communicate well with me? This is usually the first sign of trouble. When your account rep stops returning your emails or phone calls, it quickly becomes obvious that the relationship isn’t working. But what about when the rep is slow to respond to questions or concerns but quick to place an order on your behalf? If your concerns are not addressed as quickly as your orders, speak up. And if you can’t reach a new agreement, request a new account rep before you become so frustrated you drop the vendor.
2. Does my account rep call me about price changes? If an item you order on a frequent basis goes up in price, your account rep should call you before the price change occurs. If this is something you discover on your own, a red flag should go up. The account rep is there to keep you, the customer, happy and informed. The time it takes to call or email you to alert you of a price change is nominal compared to the level of frustration you will experience when you discover these things on your own.
3. Does my account rep know what I look like? I have been working for my employer for a year and a half – and ordering from this vendor for just as long. I know her office is within a half hour of my office. Do I know what she looks like? No. Does she have a firm understanding of who my company is? Definitely not. Your account rep needs to know who you are in order to help your company best. A ten minute stop in to your office goes a long way. The rep doesn’t need to be my best friend but she should be comfortable leaving her office and stopping by mine with new catalogs and services at least once a year.
I didn’t spend too much time thinking about these questions until the situation had gotten out of hand. Asking for a new account rep is easier than switching vendors and most companies live by the rule that it is easier to keep a customer than find a new one. Sure, the conversation is a little awkward at best but at least you don’t have return each others stuff at the end of it.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Investing in You: Make wise choices
When I first got out of college, investing in me almost seemed silly. I had just spent 150k on an undergraduate education – wasn’t that enough? I didn’t need to worry about taking classes anymore, I was ready to hit the corporate world and look fabulous doing it.
As a result, I bought more suits than I probably needed, skimped on true professional development and then spent a year and a half at Starbucks trying to figure what it was that I really wanted to do. Those suits, that looked so fabulous at the time, are still sitting in my closet and rarely see the light of day.
Investing in you is important for every career but how you invest is the key. You can spend money to make sure you look the part but if you don’t have all of the skills (or at least a plan) to back it up, you aren’t going to get very far.
So. How to invest? How do we make wise choices when it comes to ourselves? These are a few of the ways I try to find a balance.
Clothes: Don’t stock up on business attire until you get the job. I have a ton of suits in my closet that I rarely wear. Why? Because the dress code at my job is Lab Casual. Had I waited until I had the job, I would have realized that client days at my office are few and far between.
Tip: Own enough suits to not repeat during the interview process. If you aren’t sure how many interviews are in the company’s process, make sure you have two suits. You can always play with accessories to change the look. Once you get the job, you’ll have a better idea of the clothes you will really need.
Classes: Continuing Education Credits (CEC) are your friend. It took me two years post-college to get back into the classroom. I was convinced that because I spent so much money on undergrad, I didn’t need to spend money on more classes until I either went to grad school or got my soul back from Sallie Mae. Sure, I can write a fabulous business plan but ask me to format it a certain way and I might not have the skills to back it up.
Tip: Figure out where your weak spots are and target those. It is far easier to stay in the classroom than to get back into it. I recently completed 9 weeks in a program about Microsoft Access and have now become my company’s go to person for Access help. I couldn’t have done it with a few CECs. It also keeps you occupied while you are looking for the job you really want and sets you ahead of the pack. The American Management Association also has some great courses that are offered at some local community colleges which can mean a savings in price for you ($400 versus $2000).
Vacation: If you burn yourself out from the beginning, you’re of no good. One of the ways I chronically neglect myself is by failing to get the rest I really need. After a while, I’m not only no good to my team but I’m of no good to myself. It can quickly place you in a vicious cycle that is overwhelming and just not effective. A vacation is your chance to invest in your mental health. A bonus is the first few days when you get back and you can attack your job with fresh eyes and ideas.
Tip: Find someone to hold you accountable to relax. For me, my husband is the one who makes sure I find the time (he has no problem saying that he needs a vacation whereas I always think I can put it off one more month). It helps to keep me in balance. For you, it could be friend, relative or coworker. Don't let money be the issue that stops you. When we have more money, we take a cruise (I love the idea of a floating hotel to take me away from all of my problems). When money is tight, we go camping for a long weekend ($200 is usually enough to pay for campground fees, gas and tolls).
Investing in you is such an important part of every career. Make sure your investments keep you on track for your goals.
As a result, I bought more suits than I probably needed, skimped on true professional development and then spent a year and a half at Starbucks trying to figure what it was that I really wanted to do. Those suits, that looked so fabulous at the time, are still sitting in my closet and rarely see the light of day.
Investing in you is important for every career but how you invest is the key. You can spend money to make sure you look the part but if you don’t have all of the skills (or at least a plan) to back it up, you aren’t going to get very far.
So. How to invest? How do we make wise choices when it comes to ourselves? These are a few of the ways I try to find a balance.
Clothes: Don’t stock up on business attire until you get the job. I have a ton of suits in my closet that I rarely wear. Why? Because the dress code at my job is Lab Casual. Had I waited until I had the job, I would have realized that client days at my office are few and far between.
Tip: Own enough suits to not repeat during the interview process. If you aren’t sure how many interviews are in the company’s process, make sure you have two suits. You can always play with accessories to change the look. Once you get the job, you’ll have a better idea of the clothes you will really need.
Classes: Continuing Education Credits (CEC) are your friend. It took me two years post-college to get back into the classroom. I was convinced that because I spent so much money on undergrad, I didn’t need to spend money on more classes until I either went to grad school or got my soul back from Sallie Mae. Sure, I can write a fabulous business plan but ask me to format it a certain way and I might not have the skills to back it up.
Tip: Figure out where your weak spots are and target those. It is far easier to stay in the classroom than to get back into it. I recently completed 9 weeks in a program about Microsoft Access and have now become my company’s go to person for Access help. I couldn’t have done it with a few CECs. It also keeps you occupied while you are looking for the job you really want and sets you ahead of the pack. The American Management Association also has some great courses that are offered at some local community colleges which can mean a savings in price for you ($400 versus $2000).
Vacation: If you burn yourself out from the beginning, you’re of no good. One of the ways I chronically neglect myself is by failing to get the rest I really need. After a while, I’m not only no good to my team but I’m of no good to myself. It can quickly place you in a vicious cycle that is overwhelming and just not effective. A vacation is your chance to invest in your mental health. A bonus is the first few days when you get back and you can attack your job with fresh eyes and ideas.
Tip: Find someone to hold you accountable to relax. For me, my husband is the one who makes sure I find the time (he has no problem saying that he needs a vacation whereas I always think I can put it off one more month). It helps to keep me in balance. For you, it could be friend, relative or coworker. Don't let money be the issue that stops you. When we have more money, we take a cruise (I love the idea of a floating hotel to take me away from all of my problems). When money is tight, we go camping for a long weekend ($200 is usually enough to pay for campground fees, gas and tolls).
Investing in you is such an important part of every career. Make sure your investments keep you on track for your goals.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
How do you know when its time to move forward?
I like to tease my friend C that she actually a closet speed freak and no one else is on to it yet. She usually tells me that as a former addictions counselor, she realizes that her drugs of choice would be opiates. I’m only half kidding with her though – C fits more things into a day than most people do in a week. Somehow she rarely seems to burn out. She’s the type of girl who can change jobs, plan a wedding/get married and buy and decorate a new home in the span of 6 weeks. And still have time to hang out with friends while still looking fabulous.
Sometimes I hate her for that. Just Kidding, I hope.
C’s wedding was about 6 weeks ago and I think for about the first time in a year she has time to sit down and relax. So of course, she’s looking for some thing new to do. Which is also known as going back to school for a Ph.D. Even though, they don’t really have the money (a mortgage, student loans from her masters degree and 2 car payments can suck you dry pretty quick), she still wants to make it happen. But she’s also concerned about kids and what that timeline looks like. She’s pretty much made up her mind on where she wants to go but I can’t help but think she’s missing a few steps before she could make that decision.
Clearly, C needs feedback so I sent her the following email (details changed for privacy purposes):
C,
OOH OOH OOH! I have PLENTY of feedback! (This is me in "swift kick" mode fueled by love.)
What other schools have you been looking into? Why do you not feel as tempted by those institutions?
Regarding kids:
If you think you want to have kids in the next 1 to 3 years, I would strongly suggest that you wait on a doctoral program.
If you think you want to have kids in the next 3 to 6 years, go for the Ph.D. You won't regret it.
If you aren't sure when you want to have kids, go for the degree. Otherwise, you could be stuck in limbo forever.
The cost issue works like this:
1. Do you and hubby both have life insurance policies out on each other (so that you would not lose the house should one of you die)? If the answer is no, do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars.
2. Do you and hubby have six months worth of living expenses (including: tithe, food, clothes, mortgage, utilities, phone, health insurance, car payments, car maintenance, gasoline, taxes, car insurance, co-pays, home maintenance, student loans, etc.) set aside should one of you lose your job? If the answer is no, further education is on hold until this need is met?
3. Are you currently making contributions towards your retirement? If the answer is no, who do you think is going to pay for your old age? And will they pay for mine as well? Don't tell me the government will or I won't be able to contain my laughter at work.
What does graduate school look like for hubby? Where is the priority here? Do you need a Ph.D. to continue advancing in your field immediately? Does hubby require a master's degree to continue advancing in his field immediately? Who will benefit more from having their education needs met first?
I'm a big fan of taking continuing education credits before you are financially ready for a degree. And you can always take classes at a community college on Fridays to continue to increase your job skills.
Finally, how do you feel about the rest of your life? Is this antsy-ness coming from a stillness in your life that you are not used to? Are there projects/passions/ideas you want to explore both you move on to the next step in your life? You won't have the freedom to explore those things right after you have kids. (Don't get me wrong, you probably will later on but not in the same ways you do now). And C, I know you a very used to a crazy schedule but maybe this is a good time for you to be still and quiet and nurture your marriage with hubby. I hope you take time to enjoy the newness of marriage and explore each other and yourselves as married people. If it was me, I would wait until the one year mark before I began to address further education.
So I think I threw a lot at you. I hope I made it clear and I hope you see the motivation behind these questions/points. I'm not necessarily advocating one way or the other for right now (but I probably will later on).
Love ya,
Dorie
My questions are these: Do I have it all covered or did I miss some key question along the way? What steps should you have in place in your life before you make a big decision? At what age does it stop being okay to pile on debt in the name of one’s education?
Sometimes I hate her for that. Just Kidding, I hope.
C’s wedding was about 6 weeks ago and I think for about the first time in a year she has time to sit down and relax. So of course, she’s looking for some thing new to do. Which is also known as going back to school for a Ph.D. Even though, they don’t really have the money (a mortgage, student loans from her masters degree and 2 car payments can suck you dry pretty quick), she still wants to make it happen. But she’s also concerned about kids and what that timeline looks like. She’s pretty much made up her mind on where she wants to go but I can’t help but think she’s missing a few steps before she could make that decision.
Clearly, C needs feedback so I sent her the following email (details changed for privacy purposes):
C,
OOH OOH OOH! I have PLENTY of feedback! (This is me in "swift kick" mode fueled by love.)
What other schools have you been looking into? Why do you not feel as tempted by those institutions?
Regarding kids:
If you think you want to have kids in the next 1 to 3 years, I would strongly suggest that you wait on a doctoral program.
If you think you want to have kids in the next 3 to 6 years, go for the Ph.D. You won't regret it.
If you aren't sure when you want to have kids, go for the degree. Otherwise, you could be stuck in limbo forever.
The cost issue works like this:
1. Do you and hubby both have life insurance policies out on each other (so that you would not lose the house should one of you die)? If the answer is no, do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars.
2. Do you and hubby have six months worth of living expenses (including: tithe, food, clothes, mortgage, utilities, phone, health insurance, car payments, car maintenance, gasoline, taxes, car insurance, co-pays, home maintenance, student loans, etc.) set aside should one of you lose your job? If the answer is no, further education is on hold until this need is met?
3. Are you currently making contributions towards your retirement? If the answer is no, who do you think is going to pay for your old age? And will they pay for mine as well? Don't tell me the government will or I won't be able to contain my laughter at work.
What does graduate school look like for hubby? Where is the priority here? Do you need a Ph.D. to continue advancing in your field immediately? Does hubby require a master's degree to continue advancing in his field immediately? Who will benefit more from having their education needs met first?
I'm a big fan of taking continuing education credits before you are financially ready for a degree. And you can always take classes at a community college on Fridays to continue to increase your job skills.
Finally, how do you feel about the rest of your life? Is this antsy-ness coming from a stillness in your life that you are not used to? Are there projects/passions/ideas you want to explore both you move on to the next step in your life? You won't have the freedom to explore those things right after you have kids. (Don't get me wrong, you probably will later on but not in the same ways you do now). And C, I know you a very used to a crazy schedule but maybe this is a good time for you to be still and quiet and nurture your marriage with hubby. I hope you take time to enjoy the newness of marriage and explore each other and yourselves as married people. If it was me, I would wait until the one year mark before I began to address further education.
So I think I threw a lot at you. I hope I made it clear and I hope you see the motivation behind these questions/points. I'm not necessarily advocating one way or the other for right now (but I probably will later on).
Love ya,
Dorie
My questions are these: Do I have it all covered or did I miss some key question along the way? What steps should you have in place in your life before you make a big decision? At what age does it stop being okay to pile on debt in the name of one’s education?
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Why the meal does not make it better
While most of my friends who are not in a trade wear a suit to work everyday, I have the pleasure of working a business casual sort of environment. But since two thirds of our facility is a laboratory, we really wear "lab casual" each day. Lab Casual around here means jeans and a t-shirt, maybe a sweatshirt in colder weather.
I don't want to sound like we are total scrubs - we step up our attire to dress slacks and suits when clients are in or if we are attending an industry event but day to day is pretty relaxed. For me, its an added benefit to my job - I get to save a lot of money on clothing for work and the simple action of wearing a polo shirt instead of a t-shirt catapults me to well dressed category of the office.
We also dress up for annual reviews. Why? Because we go out to a very nice local restaurant called Augusto's. Augusto's is a great place for dinner with a client or a quiet dinner with your significant other but it is brutal for an annual review.
Despite the best of intentions to make the annual review process as pleasant as possible, all I am really left with indigestion.
Yesterday was my first annual review with my organization. It was the most anxious filled hour I have spent at this company to date. The review went well. My supervisor had nothing but praises to say of my last year. I am very happy with the compensation that was offered to me as a reward. But having a plate of food in front of me almost made it worse. I kept waiting to hear bad news so I could choke on my chicken and gnnochi as a self perservation tactic.
A few months ago, Brad Hilderbrand wrote about the dreaded performance review at Employee Evolution. At the time, I just sort of laughed about it, left a comment and continued on with my day. Ten minutes before show time yesterday, I found myself rereading and searching the comment section for hope. Its good to know that I'm not the only one with a reveiw but I am quite sure I am the only one who had to do it eating.
I don't want to sound like we are total scrubs - we step up our attire to dress slacks and suits when clients are in or if we are attending an industry event but day to day is pretty relaxed. For me, its an added benefit to my job - I get to save a lot of money on clothing for work and the simple action of wearing a polo shirt instead of a t-shirt catapults me to well dressed category of the office.
We also dress up for annual reviews. Why? Because we go out to a very nice local restaurant called Augusto's. Augusto's is a great place for dinner with a client or a quiet dinner with your significant other but it is brutal for an annual review.
Despite the best of intentions to make the annual review process as pleasant as possible, all I am really left with indigestion.
Yesterday was my first annual review with my organization. It was the most anxious filled hour I have spent at this company to date. The review went well. My supervisor had nothing but praises to say of my last year. I am very happy with the compensation that was offered to me as a reward. But having a plate of food in front of me almost made it worse. I kept waiting to hear bad news so I could choke on my chicken and gnnochi as a self perservation tactic.
A few months ago, Brad Hilderbrand wrote about the dreaded performance review at Employee Evolution. At the time, I just sort of laughed about it, left a comment and continued on with my day. Ten minutes before show time yesterday, I found myself rereading and searching the comment section for hope. Its good to know that I'm not the only one with a reveiw but I am quite sure I am the only one who had to do it eating.
Friday, February 29, 2008
Why your parents have been lying to you
Whether you want to admit it or not, your parents have been lying to you for longer than you can remember. At first it was little lies – Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny and Cupid fall into this category. Then the lies got a little bigger – Prince Charming is one of those lies women wrestle with into their thirties. But then came the most monstrous lies of all with the first being “Love Conquers All” and the second being “You can be anything you want to be”.
I’m not capable of touching the first one with a ten foot pole so let me set you straight on the second: You can’t be anything you want to be.
Sucks, doesn’t it?
Need proof?
You cannot be a prince/princess unless you were born into a royal lineage or unless you can manage to smile with your eyes wide open and even then there is a long audition process before you can become a Disney Princess.
That one is a little obvious so let’s try again:
You cannot be a professional athlete unless you are gifted in a physically adept manner, have made the necessary sacrifices of both your body and time and have committed yourself to achieving excellence. I may want to be a professional athlete but with my genetic blessings, it isn’t going to happen in this lifetime.
Life is about choices and the idea of being whatever you want strips young people of the ability to make honest, informed choices.
When I was a little girl, I wanted to be a professional actress when I grew up. More specifically, I wanted to be on Broadway. I wanted to be a leading lady who sang and danced and was adored. But I am not a dancer. Nor was I that interested in becoming an accomplished dancer (like I said before, my physical prowess leaves much to be desired). I knew not to fool myself from an early age. But when I went to college, I discovered plenty of women who were like me except that they still believed they would be Broadway stars. Their parents were still telling them that they could be whatever they dreamed of.
To a certain extent, it may be okay to lie to kids about this. I’m not a parent so I don’t know for sure but from this end of things, it seems to cripple my peers instead of helping them. Maybe it would be better to tell kids that with hard work, they could do wonderful things.
The question becomes, at least for me, at what point must the truth come out? Fulfilling a dream requires hard work, dedication, vision, preparation, opportunity and passion. Or maybe, the question is really about when it is time to surrender the fantasy. When does dedication become delusional? There is always that fine line between brilliance and crazy.
But what I am really trying to stress is that adult life is about choices. I work to pay my bills. I am not looking for the career equivalent of hitting the lottery. But I am looking for the freedom to pursue my own loves on my own time. Because at the end of the day, you probably can’t have it all. You can’t have the perfect job, the perfect family and time for your hobbies, unless you think you don’t need to sleep at night. And by kidding yourself that you can have it all and stay sane, you put off the choice aspect of adulthood.
I’m not capable of touching the first one with a ten foot pole so let me set you straight on the second: You can’t be anything you want to be.
Sucks, doesn’t it?
Need proof?
You cannot be a prince/princess unless you were born into a royal lineage or unless you can manage to smile with your eyes wide open and even then there is a long audition process before you can become a Disney Princess.
That one is a little obvious so let’s try again:
You cannot be a professional athlete unless you are gifted in a physically adept manner, have made the necessary sacrifices of both your body and time and have committed yourself to achieving excellence. I may want to be a professional athlete but with my genetic blessings, it isn’t going to happen in this lifetime.
Life is about choices and the idea of being whatever you want strips young people of the ability to make honest, informed choices.
When I was a little girl, I wanted to be a professional actress when I grew up. More specifically, I wanted to be on Broadway. I wanted to be a leading lady who sang and danced and was adored. But I am not a dancer. Nor was I that interested in becoming an accomplished dancer (like I said before, my physical prowess leaves much to be desired). I knew not to fool myself from an early age. But when I went to college, I discovered plenty of women who were like me except that they still believed they would be Broadway stars. Their parents were still telling them that they could be whatever they dreamed of.
To a certain extent, it may be okay to lie to kids about this. I’m not a parent so I don’t know for sure but from this end of things, it seems to cripple my peers instead of helping them. Maybe it would be better to tell kids that with hard work, they could do wonderful things.
The question becomes, at least for me, at what point must the truth come out? Fulfilling a dream requires hard work, dedication, vision, preparation, opportunity and passion. Or maybe, the question is really about when it is time to surrender the fantasy. When does dedication become delusional? There is always that fine line between brilliance and crazy.
But what I am really trying to stress is that adult life is about choices. I work to pay my bills. I am not looking for the career equivalent of hitting the lottery. But I am looking for the freedom to pursue my own loves on my own time. Because at the end of the day, you probably can’t have it all. You can’t have the perfect job, the perfect family and time for your hobbies, unless you think you don’t need to sleep at night. And by kidding yourself that you can have it all and stay sane, you put off the choice aspect of adulthood.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Why Penelope is the swift kick in the ass you need
Penelope Trunk's Steps to figuring out your next career move should be giving your career the swift kick in the ass your twenty-something career needs. How do I know this is what you need? With the opening paragraph closing with the line "The ones who are complaining the most right now, after reading just this far, are the people who are most in denial of what adult life is about", you can't help but realize that what you'll read next is everything you didn't want to hear but you had to anyway.
Penelope also gives you the kick your life needs. Afterall, your job or your career is merely a symptom of what the rest of your life looks like. If your home life is in shambles, it is merely a matter of time until your work life is too. If work is falling apart, your marriage or family life will feel the strain. The exercise Penelope provides can really be applied to any aspect of your life. Its really all about making choices and cutting the excess.
I've taken the list Penelope provided and I tried to apply it to my personal life. Below you'll see her list in bold and my comments in italics.
1. Eliminate stuff. I hate to admit but Brian and I have a stuff problem. Both in the activities we take on and the things we possess. This is great advice where ever you are in life. When I was looking at my own list of my life, I noticed that I have this tendency to stay involved in organizations that I don't believe in just because I don't want to quit. By giving up volunteer work for organizations I no longer believe and cutting back on Township meetings I don't really need to be at, I made more time for the things I actually need or want to do. Next step: clearing out the spare bedroom that only makes Brian and I feel swamped and overwhelmed.
2. Look at what’s left. What's left is still a pretty expansive list. It is so easy to forget about the many rolls we have in our own lives. Wife. Daughter. Clerical Assistant. Member of the Well. Aunt. Granddaughter. Writer. Painter. Reader. Volunteer. Family Organizer. Cook. The list really could go on for days. This is then your cue to go back to item one and see what other stuff you can eliminate.
3. Check in with yourself. I try to convince myself that I love doing things to make my husband's life easier. But sometimes I don't and I don't want to admit. You have to check in with yourself to see what you still value. If you don't know what you value personally, how will you know what you value professionally? If you need help with this task, try taking the Franklin Covey FOCUS seminar. I assure you, it will be money well spent.
4. Be honest about what you love. Penelope suggests using sex as a litmus test. Which may or may not work depending on the type of person you are. For me, it works. For my friend Kim, that litmus test would not work at all. A better test for her would be daytime TIVOed TV. Whatever it is you love, its okay. Just make sure you know what it is.
5. Admit if you lack a clear passion. Not to bust on Kim but she has no clear passion. That's why she is a paralegal in a Philadelphia law office. She makes steady money, her needs are met and she has a reasonable work week leaving her time to watch tv in the evenings. That's the life she wanted. My friend Jeannie, on the other hand, has always been passionate about psychology. She isn't making great money but she loves what she does. She knows where her passion is. The important thing here is that both of my friends know what they are and are not passionate about and they plan their lives accordingly.
6. Get busy. Doing anything. And on that note....
Penelope also gives you the kick your life needs. Afterall, your job or your career is merely a symptom of what the rest of your life looks like. If your home life is in shambles, it is merely a matter of time until your work life is too. If work is falling apart, your marriage or family life will feel the strain. The exercise Penelope provides can really be applied to any aspect of your life. Its really all about making choices and cutting the excess.
I've taken the list Penelope provided and I tried to apply it to my personal life. Below you'll see her list in bold and my comments in italics.
1. Eliminate stuff. I hate to admit but Brian and I have a stuff problem. Both in the activities we take on and the things we possess. This is great advice where ever you are in life. When I was looking at my own list of my life, I noticed that I have this tendency to stay involved in organizations that I don't believe in just because I don't want to quit. By giving up volunteer work for organizations I no longer believe and cutting back on Township meetings I don't really need to be at, I made more time for the things I actually need or want to do. Next step: clearing out the spare bedroom that only makes Brian and I feel swamped and overwhelmed.
2. Look at what’s left. What's left is still a pretty expansive list. It is so easy to forget about the many rolls we have in our own lives. Wife. Daughter. Clerical Assistant. Member of the Well. Aunt. Granddaughter. Writer. Painter. Reader. Volunteer. Family Organizer. Cook. The list really could go on for days. This is then your cue to go back to item one and see what other stuff you can eliminate.
3. Check in with yourself. I try to convince myself that I love doing things to make my husband's life easier. But sometimes I don't and I don't want to admit. You have to check in with yourself to see what you still value. If you don't know what you value personally, how will you know what you value professionally? If you need help with this task, try taking the Franklin Covey FOCUS seminar. I assure you, it will be money well spent.
4. Be honest about what you love. Penelope suggests using sex as a litmus test. Which may or may not work depending on the type of person you are. For me, it works. For my friend Kim, that litmus test would not work at all. A better test for her would be daytime TIVOed TV. Whatever it is you love, its okay. Just make sure you know what it is.
5. Admit if you lack a clear passion. Not to bust on Kim but she has no clear passion. That's why she is a paralegal in a Philadelphia law office. She makes steady money, her needs are met and she has a reasonable work week leaving her time to watch tv in the evenings. That's the life she wanted. My friend Jeannie, on the other hand, has always been passionate about psychology. She isn't making great money but she loves what she does. She knows where her passion is. The important thing here is that both of my friends know what they are and are not passionate about and they plan their lives accordingly.
6. Get busy. Doing anything. And on that note....
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Why you can’t afford to forget your expense sheet.
The end of the month is quickly approaching... Have you submited your expense sheet yet? I know none of us would dream of not submitting our time sheets but for some reason, the same level of importance is not attached to our expense sheets.
I see it all the time at my office: individuals who are not salaried doing company errands on their own time and then never turn in an expense sheet or bill for the hours they worked. The worst part is that it is more common than you think. Frequently, my company only issues one or two reimbursement checks per month.
By not submitting an expense sheet, you are only setting yourself up for failure. You are sending several, very loud and very negative messages to your supervisors and your colleagues. You might as well walk around in a t-shirt that says “I don’t value myself and you shouldn’t either”.
Don’t understand why? Here’s a brief but by no means exhaustive list.
1. You just hurt your ability to negotiate for a raise. Have you gotten a raise lately? Was your last raise everything you wanted it to be? Do you make more money than you know what to do with? Are you independently wealthy and just working for kicks? Unless the answer for all of those questions is yes, you need to submit a sheet. The company isn’t going to remind. HR will not send you an email with the subject line “I notice we owe you money”. But they will notice. And if getting money that is rightfully yours isn’t high on your priority list, getting a raise probably isn’t. If I was your boss, I wouldn’t want to give you more money if you didn’t properly manage the money you already have.
2. You just said you have nothing better to do with your time. I want to work with a group of people with diverse interests and skills. I do not want to work with a group of people that only work. If you are running errands on your personal time and not billing for the hours, you just told your boss that you lead a flat, boring life. My most effective coworkers are individuals who are busy with philanthropy, sports, churches, special interest groups, etc. outside of work. Put yourself in the effective category and get a life.
3. You just obliterated your chance at work/life balance. If you are free to run company errands on your nights and weekends, you’ll never have time for the hobbies you now have in Point #2. While work/life balance is something that falls in the obsolete idea category, most management does not realize it yet. Working an eighty hour work week won’t make you happy. Finding time to better yourself outside of work will. Read a book, visit your grandparents, do some charity work – all of these activities add balance and meaning to your life.
4. You just discounted your contributions to the company. I periodically come into work on a Saturday morning or a Sunday afternoon to clear out some of the work that will only clog the beginning of my next week. I like to start Monday feel clear and refreshed. But when I come in, I make sure my boss and my boss’s boss know about it. And I make sure I’m paid for it. My weekend work time is some of my most productive time all week and I want to make sure my contributions are seen and appreciated. If you need to work a weekend, fine, do it, and do it with a smile on your face. But make sure it is noted. And make sure it doesn’t happen every week. Once a month is plenty. And take the extra cash you earn as an hourly associate and invest it in your career. The money I make in over time goes towards learning new skills that will benefit my career or new suiting.
As odd as it sounds, your expense sheet is a great way to show your company just how hard you work and it is your ticket to getting a company credit card if you haven’t already. If you don’t show that your contributions are consistent and beneficial, no one else will have the time to take note. Your expense sheet is a habit you can't afford to neglect.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Why the roofers are driving me nuts - and it isn't just the loud noise
Today I have the joy of listening to the roofers work above my desk and I am not so secretly waiting for a roofer to come crashing through and end up in my lap. The constant ripping and grinding noises are constant and nagging. To be honest, I’m not really getting all that much done today but at least I’m being paid. I’m really just perfecting the art of puttering and trying to make research projects look more substantial than they really are.
At my job, nothing stops the work. When it snows, we work. When part of the building is under construction, we work. When the server is down and there is no access to our computer files, we work. When the power is out, we work. When a roofer is tearing out and old roof and installing a new one (causing debris to fall into the office, I might add), we work. Nothing halts operations. I suspect that even if the President of our company died suddenly, he’d come back from the grave to haunt us if we even stopped working for a moment.
My intent here is not to make the owner of the company sound like a complete slave driver – he really isn’t. We have great employee benefits – our health care is totally covered by the company (and the insurance is Personal Choice which is costs more than what I make in a week). We are eligible for tuition reimbursement after 3 months. The company brings food in all of the time for employees. We have booze at our company events. I know I am luckier than most of my friends at this point in our careers.
But.
We never stop.
I’m not sure that our president has caught on that days like these, our productivity is shot. Any task that requires concentration is just not going to happen. And seeing that I work for a small contract manufacturer/pharmaceutical consulting company, everything we do requires concentration. I don’t think the president has noticed that we are all aimlessly wandering today.
I can’t help but wonder, what would happen had the executive staff opted to give us a week off while the roof was being replaced. Would employee moral gone up? Compared to what it is today, I’m fairly certain it would. I’m pretty certain that a bonus week off would do a lot more for productivity than try to eek out acceptable work during chaos.
Somehow, this doesn’t appear to be an acceptable option. And as someone who wants more flexible work time and work space, I find really disappointing. I want the executive staff of the company where I work to be concerned more with my productivity than the number of hours that I log in the office. I would much rather work 35 highly productive hours than get paid for 50 relatively productive hours. I want the hours I work to really count.
At my job, nothing stops the work. When it snows, we work. When part of the building is under construction, we work. When the server is down and there is no access to our computer files, we work. When the power is out, we work. When a roofer is tearing out and old roof and installing a new one (causing debris to fall into the office, I might add), we work. Nothing halts operations. I suspect that even if the President of our company died suddenly, he’d come back from the grave to haunt us if we even stopped working for a moment.
My intent here is not to make the owner of the company sound like a complete slave driver – he really isn’t. We have great employee benefits – our health care is totally covered by the company (and the insurance is Personal Choice which is costs more than what I make in a week). We are eligible for tuition reimbursement after 3 months. The company brings food in all of the time for employees. We have booze at our company events. I know I am luckier than most of my friends at this point in our careers.
But.
We never stop.
I’m not sure that our president has caught on that days like these, our productivity is shot. Any task that requires concentration is just not going to happen. And seeing that I work for a small contract manufacturer/pharmaceutical consulting company, everything we do requires concentration. I don’t think the president has noticed that we are all aimlessly wandering today.
I can’t help but wonder, what would happen had the executive staff opted to give us a week off while the roof was being replaced. Would employee moral gone up? Compared to what it is today, I’m fairly certain it would. I’m pretty certain that a bonus week off would do a lot more for productivity than try to eek out acceptable work during chaos.
Somehow, this doesn’t appear to be an acceptable option. And as someone who wants more flexible work time and work space, I find really disappointing. I want the executive staff of the company where I work to be concerned more with my productivity than the number of hours that I log in the office. I would much rather work 35 highly productive hours than get paid for 50 relatively productive hours. I want the hours I work to really count.
Friday, January 18, 2008
Why Working the Front Desk is More Difficult than It Seems: Part 1
The Phone Calls.
For the last week, it has been next to impossible for me to take a bathroom break at work. Clearly, lunch has then been out of the question. My boss has been out of the office (again) with chronic sinusitis which she now believes is terminal. And despite my constant reassurances that no, it is not terminal unless you take a vacation, I’m starting to believe it might kill her. Or me. Either way, it isn’t going well.
One of the downsides to work at a small company is the lack of help that can be available at times. I’m certainly not trying to imply that individuals don’t want to help each other. I’m just trying to imply that I have to bribe my coworkers with treats or prizes to help me with tasks in the office. I tried writing short notes of gratitude for a while but that had next to no impact.
So while my boss is out of the office with terminal chronic sinusitis, I don’t really get to eat or pee because there is no one who will answer the phones. I usually get plenty of promises for phone help but no follow through. And the worst feeling in the world of the administrative support staff is hearing a client’s voice on the answering machine while you are fighting to pull your control top panty hose back up.
Really the whole situation could be avoided if the president of my company was ready and willing to invest in voice mail but as our bookkeeper likes to remind us, he is penny wise and dollar poor.
A lack of phone coverage isn’t the only reason why working the phones is tough.
Telemarketers are tough. Repeat calls from telemarketers are tough. And effectively communicating with telemarketers is next to impossible.
Take the following phone call.
Perky Clerical Assistant, aka, Me: Good Afternoon, Very Specialized Pharmaceutical Company, How may help you?
Manipulative Telemarketer: Mr President please.
Me: May I ask who is calling?
Manipulative Telemarketer: John.
Me: And your last name John?
Manipulative Telemarketer: Doe
Me: And what company are you calling from?
Manipulative Telemarketer: Generic Telemarketing Group
Me: Please Hold.
At this point, I leave the telemarketer on hold for an ungodly amount of time. And I do not waste the time of Mr. President by letting him know that the manipulative telemarketer is calling for him. After all, there are at least five of these calls a day.
Me: I’m sorry, Mr. President is unavailable at the moment, may I take a message.
Manipulative Telemarketer: Can I have his voice mail?
Me: I’m sorry but we don’t have voicemail, may I take a message?
Manipulative Telemarketer: Well when can I call back? When will he be available?
Me: Mr. President is a very busy man. The best way to get in touch with him is to let me take a message.
Manipulative Telemarketer: I’ll call back.
What manipulative telemarketer doesn’t know is that I now have their name and its on my list. Haha. At least it makes the process a little swifter next time.
The other difficult caller is the overly entitled client or potential client. The world does not stop because you called us. Strangely, the world will continue to turn with or without your permission.
For the last week, it has been next to impossible for me to take a bathroom break at work. Clearly, lunch has then been out of the question. My boss has been out of the office (again) with chronic sinusitis which she now believes is terminal. And despite my constant reassurances that no, it is not terminal unless you take a vacation, I’m starting to believe it might kill her. Or me. Either way, it isn’t going well.
One of the downsides to work at a small company is the lack of help that can be available at times. I’m certainly not trying to imply that individuals don’t want to help each other. I’m just trying to imply that I have to bribe my coworkers with treats or prizes to help me with tasks in the office. I tried writing short notes of gratitude for a while but that had next to no impact.
So while my boss is out of the office with terminal chronic sinusitis, I don’t really get to eat or pee because there is no one who will answer the phones. I usually get plenty of promises for phone help but no follow through. And the worst feeling in the world of the administrative support staff is hearing a client’s voice on the answering machine while you are fighting to pull your control top panty hose back up.
Really the whole situation could be avoided if the president of my company was ready and willing to invest in voice mail but as our bookkeeper likes to remind us, he is penny wise and dollar poor.
A lack of phone coverage isn’t the only reason why working the phones is tough.
Telemarketers are tough. Repeat calls from telemarketers are tough. And effectively communicating with telemarketers is next to impossible.
Take the following phone call.
Perky Clerical Assistant, aka, Me: Good Afternoon, Very Specialized Pharmaceutical Company, How may help you?
Manipulative Telemarketer: Mr President please.
Me: May I ask who is calling?
Manipulative Telemarketer: John.
Me: And your last name John?
Manipulative Telemarketer: Doe
Me: And what company are you calling from?
Manipulative Telemarketer: Generic Telemarketing Group
Me: Please Hold.
At this point, I leave the telemarketer on hold for an ungodly amount of time. And I do not waste the time of Mr. President by letting him know that the manipulative telemarketer is calling for him. After all, there are at least five of these calls a day.
Me: I’m sorry, Mr. President is unavailable at the moment, may I take a message.
Manipulative Telemarketer: Can I have his voice mail?
Me: I’m sorry but we don’t have voicemail, may I take a message?
Manipulative Telemarketer: Well when can I call back? When will he be available?
Me: Mr. President is a very busy man. The best way to get in touch with him is to let me take a message.
Manipulative Telemarketer: I’ll call back.
What manipulative telemarketer doesn’t know is that I now have their name and its on my list. Haha. At least it makes the process a little swifter next time.
The other difficult caller is the overly entitled client or potential client. The world does not stop because you called us. Strangely, the world will continue to turn with or without your permission.
Monday, December 31, 2007
My 5 Goals for 2008
The day after Christmas, I wrote goals for 2008 in the front of my pink FranklinCovey planner. Usually, I go a bit overboard with my resolutions. One year, I had upward of twenty five. Most years, however, I stay between ten and fifteen goals. No wonder I fail.
I set five different goals for myself this year, which was a quite a cut back for me. There are, as follows:
I set five different goals for myself this year, which was a quite a cut back for me. There are, as follows:
- I will take better, proactive care of my health.
- I will be kinder to my body.
- I will read.
- I will prioritize.
- I will write.
While none of these are particularly earth shattering, lofty goals, I think I have a better shot of achieving them this year. While Penelope Trunk urges us to only make one goal this year (see link) I know I'm not a one goal kinda girl. I could never cut back that much. I know I'd be tacking on extra resolutions by the end of next week. I don't even think I could resolve to make no more resolutions.
This year, I'm focused on the life I really want. I want to be healthy. This may be the possible tumor talking but I think I need to account for Peter Keating and the space he occupies. I want to go to the gym. I want to eat food that is better for me. I want to sleep at night. But I also want balance. I don't want to be a health nut. I want to be able to prioritize my marriage, not my job or the other fluff. And I miss writing and reading. And by prioritizing things other than the TV, I believe that it is possible.
What are your goals for this year? And how do you plan on reaching those goals?
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